Thursday, June 14, 2007

My daughter's "Greatest Wish"

I was going through my daughter's school papers at the end of the school year, and came across something she wrote entitled: My Greatest Wish.

"My Greatest Wish is that my mom and dad went back together and live with each other. That's my greatest wish because I didn't see my dad for a long time and I miss him really much...

I know my greatest wish is not impossible but it has a good chance it won't happen. That's my greatest wish because I wanted to live with my whole family..."

This really surprised me, because she doesn't talk about her dad much, or ask to call him like her brother used to. Mustafa doesn't do that anymore because he's learned to hold his emotions in because of how his father has treated him (not calling him back, or turning off his phone when he's calling). Their dad didn't call them on their birthdays last year, or on Nabilah's birthday just last week. He doesn't even try to keep in contact with them. What does it cost to make a phone call once in a while? They keep getting disappointed by him.

It kinda reminds me of the song lyrics of Cats in the Cradle.

And as I hung up the phone it occurred to me
He'd grown up just like me
My boy was just like me

He's not keeping in contact with them, does he think they are going to do any differently when they are grown up?

I also wonder if they are going to appreciate me raising them alone, when they are grown up. Are they going to realize how hard it is, and even though I make a lot of mistakes, that I did the best I could, and that it's not easy doing it without the other parent? Probably only if they go through the same thing.

Le Sigh. I wish their dad would give a damn about them, and put them before himself, and not put his current wife and kids before them all the time. Son of a Nutcracker!


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Blogger PM said...

Dear Sister Anisa,

I hope you don't mind that I call you sister but I feel a bond with you. I can tell you from experience that the road you are on is a LOT more fulfilling than the one he is on. It may not seem so at times, but trust me, when they get older you will see how much they noted and appreciated every little thing you did. They will, God willing., spend the rest of their lives trying their best to take care of you. No amount of child support is worth the bond that you will have and their father is truly a petty man to trade off his future for the sake of saving child support money.

Trust me, I was in the same situation from 1984 until about 5 years ago and I know.

My prayers are with you,

5:58 PM  

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